Last night one of our greats passed away. If you have ever come to God is great Coors Light is good and people are crazy shirt, chances are you have met the one and only Chops, sitting on the corner, Coors Light in hand, talking up a storm. We will miss his talks of fishing, his pride in his fight with cancer, his boisterous banter, his love for The Sox, his support of The Jimmy Fund and his love for his amazing Wife, Daughter, Family and Friends. We all raise our Coors Light to the one and only Paul Chops Lambert.
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The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to God is great Coors Light is good and people are crazy shirt for directions to the Coors Light truck when the call came in. Keep this out of the reach of children. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich manoeuvre. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face. I’ve located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite.
Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I’m getting pie-eyed from all of the beer. My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead, and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher.